So it looks like I blasphemed the wrong robber baron.
I’m sorry I said your cars suck
and I apologize from the bottom of my heart
for calling you a dickhead, Mr. Ford.
But that comment about the banking system really
got my motor runnin’
and I’m all out of heartbreak motor oil
(all I got left is anti-market freeze).
How does one perform an exorcism on a Ford Windstar?
I ain’t Heroin Houdini no more
and I try not to fuck with spirits.
If I get a Ouija board, will my dashboard lights start working again?
Why’d you have to outsource my auto to the afterlife?
This is seriously fucked, Mr. Ford.
I ain’t messin’ with no Fantom Oligarchical Road Demon, man.
I guess I’ll just have to deal with your otherworldly sabotage
until I get my Cadillac.
I was gonna name the DeVille Mary Celeste,
but I don’t want no more devils in my driveway
after this mess.
No AmityDeVille Horrors for me.