The Fall Formal With Saint Philomena

The Fall Formal With Saint Philomena

The wages of sin will stretch your picaro’s pocketbook real thin. Why the pissed demeanor, for a couple of misdemeanors? Check out Miss Doomsayer over there, with that robe she aped from Death and her Pavlov’s gavel (I ain’t your dog, bitch
and I can’t be conditioned,
no matter what condition my condition is in).

Order in the court:

I’m on the docket with a prayer in my pocket
(Oh Philomena, I didn’t mean it. I’ll be a good boy).
I even listened to Jailbreak (Phillynot is a saint, too)
and read Casanova’s memoirs (breaking out of jail requires candlesticks and paintings of saints),
but I still don’t like the look on the bailiff’s face
(he’s all handcuffs and strip searches, latex gloves and Miranda fights).

Have you ever used any aliases?

Pistolwhip McGee
Mickey Phineas Chesterfield
Sterling Von Sexy Pants
Johnny Dionysus Warpath
Restglin Vale
Sir Rateval Hurtlinge…

I’m sorry, I was just trying to be formal.

At least I’ll walk out the way I came
and live to plea bargain another day
because I ain’t hip to the gaol game
and certain things I won’t let them take away.

Besides, orange isn’t a very flattering color on me.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s