The Fall Formal With Saint Philomena

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The Fall Formal With Saint Philomena

The wages of sin will stretch your picaro’s pocketbook real thin. Why the pissed demeanor, for a couple of misdemeanors? Check out Miss Doomsayer over there, with that robe she aped from Death and her Pavlov’s gavel (I ain’t your dog, bitch
and I can’t be conditioned,
no matter what condition my condition is in).

Order in the court:

I’m on the docket with a prayer in my pocket
(Oh Philomena, I didn’t mean it. I’ll be a good boy).
I even listened to Jailbreak (Phillynot is a saint, too)
and read Casanova’s memoirs (breaking out of jail requires candlesticks and paintings of saints),
but I still don’t like the look on the bailiff’s face
(he’s all handcuffs and strip searches, latex gloves and Miranda fights).

Have you ever used any aliases?

Sure:
Pistolwhip McGee
Mickey Phineas Chesterfield
Sterling Von Sexy Pants
Johnny Dionysus Warpath
Restglin Vale
Sir Rateval Hurtlinge…

I’m sorry, I was just trying to be formal.

At least I’ll walk out the way I came
and live to plea bargain another day
because I ain’t hip to the gaol game
and certain things I won’t let them take away.

Besides, orange isn’t a very flattering color on me.

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